So another ten day testing trip to the US is over. It has been a trip of much randomness, and where the normal off-track stuff is usually limited to travelling or laundry trips, this time threw up some entirely unexpected bonuses. Here are some things that I didn't expect to happen, but did:
1: Staying in a Huge house/Mansion that is so big, you can see it on Google Earth without even trying. While the town it is in is still all in the frame.
2: I got to shoot 3 handguns. Proper ones.
3: I saw a 3 hour old calf.
4: I went to dinner at a Judge's house.
5: Went to a motorbike museum and was far from bored. I'd even go back.
6: Been within 10 miles of a Tornado (even if I didn't see it).
7: We found the worst food in america (this is actually a trick one. We find this every time we go. But Tulsa, Oklahoma has the current crown. I thought I'd throw this one in, as I'd already typed '7' before thinking of one).
8: Shockingly, there are still people in this world mind-crashingly stupid enough to think that 'being 15 minutes late landing' is a good enough reason to try and make a phone call to the person picking them up at the airport. While still at 30,000 feet. I mean, it's not like they have any constantly updated information services at airports, is it? How would they ever find out about the delay? Best risk crashing the damn plane, then...
Here are some, less random, ones that are also of note:
1: Hotels with 'Econo' anywhere in the title are fucking awful. You will not get any sleep during your stay. Also of no surprise is that this was easily predicted, and could have been easily headed off at the pass.
2: Racing circuits are no fun at all when there is frost on the ground. Especially when you thought it was going to be about 15 degrees or so warmer when you packed your stuff. It's at times like that, I miss my long johns...
3: American food/coffee/beer either tastes of nothing at all, or of mouldy arse scrapings. Middle ground is very hard to find.
4: Italian home cooked food, however, is to.... die.....for. We ate so much we nearly exploded. We also got pretty larupped on wine, liqueurs and the like, too.
5: 0700 is a fucking stupid time to catch a flight. Getting up at just before 5 is all the proof you will ever need.
I have photo's and video of a lot of this. When I get organised, I'll post some. I bet you all can't wait.
This week I am in Alabama. It's been an interesting few days - from the flight being changed from one connection to two (and so a 4-5 hours journey rather than 3) on the way down to having to leave the circuit 3 hours early, dodging torrential rain...
In the process, I have learnt a few things about Alabama:
1: It's a fucking shithole.
2: See 1. Add a bit more to your perception.
3: When they say 'we may get a storm later', they actually mean 'in about an hour, we are going to come over and suggest you go over and take cover in the main building because there's a tornado coming'.
4: Everyone seems to eat a lot, regardless of how poor they look. Somehow, they seem to not suffer for a meal.
5: I found it very difficult telling the abandoned houses from the inhabited ones on the way to the track and back.
6: I don't speak Alabaman. I found it pretty hard to understand a damn word they said.
7: Birmingham, Alabama is the one city I have ever been to that you can drive around for nearly an hour on a Saturday afternoon, and the only sign of life is the guys standing outside the homeless centre. Nor can you actually find any sign of a city centre that implies life (but just happens to be closed). Weird.
The only good thing that Alabama? The fact that tomorrow I leave it to drive to Oklahoma.
Yep. That's it.
[Edit. Even worse than all the above, we found out tonight that the state doesn't sell alcohol on a Sunday. SHITHOLE!)
